There are some books that have the power to transform and impact our life in a dramatic way.
Today in me sharing my quest for more presence, I want to summarize one of the most influential (and easy to read) books, The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz. In it, shamanic teacher and healer, Don Miguel Ruiz exposes self-limiting beliefs and presents a simple and effective “code of personal conduct” learned from his Toltec ancestors.
It’s simplicity appealed to me because my life at the time felt complicated and confusing. It was messy. Reading his clear approach helped me identify and start practicing new ways of seeing the truth and not believing in the lies I had been telling myself for years. These lies field the behaviours, habits and stories that kept me stuck for so long.
They are Four Agreements to make with ourself, and they are:
- Be impeccable with your word.
- Don’t take anything personally.
- Don’t make assumptions; and
- Always do your best.
In the next few days I will present each agreement one-by-one (today is Agreement #1) followed by a brief summary underneath. Enjoy!
To Be Impeccable With Our Words
Our words are powerful. The ones we speak, the ones we DON’T speak. The words we use against ourselves, others and our life situations.
Being impeccable with our word is considered the SUPREME agreement and the essential goal as it is supported by the following three as the practice that makes the master.
Paying attention to the words I used inside my head and the ones I spewed out of my mouth helped me identify where I was outside of integrity with myself. I heard the storyteller inside my head, the one who felt powerful when she gossiped (if only for a brief moment). It was through her, that I took everything personally and made a lot of assumptions to fill in the gaps of what I didn’t really know. It was my story and words that held me back, made me fail to to my best because the story I told had me paralyzed in self doubt and fear.
In practicing this agreement, I began to clean up the talk I spoke about myself, to myself and about others and life around me. It was my stories that created the drama, emotional reaction, had me make assumptions and put me in a cycle of feeling emotionally out of control. This was the core of all my issues.
I learned that the words I use and think create my experience.
They are powerful. Everytime we speak, our words become energy through sound that land on another and if the word we speak is gossipy shit, that mess gets potentially absorbed through those we interact with. Like spreading poison.
How do you know when you are using your words impeccably?
You feel happy, good about yourself, comfortable and you feel love.
How do you know when you are using your words against yourself?
You feel suffering on some level – discomfort, anger, jealousy, sadness – the result of believing in knowledge contaminated with lies.
When we clean our word up, we can experience what it feels like to be more ourselves and in alignment to what feels right and true for us.
It’s our truth that will transform our story.
Tomorrow, I’ll review Agreement #2 (and one of my personal favourites) … DON’T TAKE ANYTHING PERSONALLY! Woo Hoo!!